Black Sheep Bass-ic Training

Doing The Christian Walk With A Funky Strut

Beracah, and the absence of anointing

on September 20, 2014

Random observation before I begin–my homepage no longer displays the 3 blogs I was following–have I been thrown off due to inactivity?

Inactivity.  On here, yes, in real life, excess of activity.  A lot of the summer spent “being led where I do not wish to go”.  Many trials.  God led me through all of them to what appears to be the Promised Land.

But it doesn’t look like I expected it to.

For over a year, I’d expected my next (final??) residence to be a modest sized house.  Had certain things I wanted to do with the space that I felt I was being led to do.  So searched diligently for a house, put my life and finances on the line multiple times…and ended up very burned by the whole experience.  I don’t know if I’ll ever try buying real estate again.  Not to say I won’t, I just don’t see it happening in the near or mid range future.

So I found an apartment.  Where I can do everything I’d intended to do with a house, except build a music studio.  Place is huge, landlady is an active believing Christian, great neighborhood, within budget, good neighbors.  Plenty of space to host small group and accommodate guests.  Just need the furniture…and I know that will come when it’s supposed to.

Feels like  a place I can truly call Beracah, for it is a God-ordained blessing.  He made this place happen.  Very little of my effort got me here, the circumstances were just too wild.

There’s just one thing making me hesitate.

The music thing.

I made a list of criteria for housing that I prayed over.  This place literally hits on ALL of them EXCEPT being able to play my music.  I do have means for “silent” bass practice, but long-term I was hoping for someplace to have an acoustic drum kit so I could learn to play.  And silent bass practice isn’t as much fun.  There’s also not really enough room in here for any other additional music gear–keyboard, recording equipment, etc.  Jam sessions would be an absolute no-no.  The downstairs neighbor would flip.

As if that weren’t enough to raise an eyebrow, there’s the strange thing happening with what I do have.

The passion’s been deflated, and the hands and ears aren’t working right.

Been feeling a disconnect in Worship Team for several weeks.  I show up, I play.  I feel nothing.

Then, while practicing this evening for tomorrow’s service, I had such a hard time trying to get a groove going with certain songs that I just put the bass down and gave up.  One of them is a song we’ve done plenty, it’s just in a different key to usual.  Transposing should not provide such a block.  1/2 step shift, big whoopie.  I know I’ve not gotten much time in on the instrument this summer due to the circumstances, but getting back on the horse should not be this hard.

So.  Could be a lot of things contributing to this, but my gut tells me that the anointing’s been lifted off my musical gift at the moment.   I don’t know why.  I have my suspicions.  Only thing I can do is pray and fellowship with the Holy Trinity to get the blockage cleared.

*shrug*

 

 

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4 responses to “Beracah, and the absence of anointing

  1. Steven Chapman says:

    Don’t assume that God has removed His anointing. Sometimes, God just allows us to walk through desert seasons, seasons when He may seem distant, our passions cool, and we don’t feel it. It is in those times that God has the ability to teach us that it is not about our feelings, but about our commitment to fellowship and obedience even when we don’t feel it. I can say this because God has walked me through those desert times in ministry during seasons in 30 years of ministry.

    • shanfield94 says:

      That makes sense. I know that ‘not living by my feelings’ is a continual struggle for me. Maybe this is an obedience test. A month after writing this blog post, I’m still not totally locked in…but practice this week has gone a bit more smoothly, so I guess I haven’t completely lost my touch…:-)

  2. Stacee Hartin says:

    I’m listening to your struggle. Praying for you. We are in this together, Sista!

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